haul one's ashes

haul one's ashes (third-person singular simple present hauls one's ashes, present participle hauling one's ashes, simple past and past participle hauled one's ashes)

1. (colloquial) To move one's body; to move away, depart.
   • 1996, Matt Braun, Bloody Hand, St. Martin's Press, →ISBN, page 222:

     Now ye and yore boys jest haul yore ashes and start makin' tracks back to the Yellowstone.

   • 2001, William W. Johnstone, Code of the Mountain Man, Pinnacle Books, →ISBN, page 265:

     "Then leave, you yeller-belly!" Luttie said. "You're paid up. Haul your ashes."
     "I believe I'll just do that little thing. I'm pullin' out...."

   • 2002, Matt Braun, Hangman's Creek, St. Martin's Press, →ISBN, pages 91–93:

     Tate uncorked a haymaker, and Starbuck ducked low, belted him in the gut.... The impact buckled Tate.... He was out cold....
     "Anybody [referring to Starbuck] that can haul Sam Tate's ashes is my kinda of man...."

2. (euphemistic) To have sexual intercourse.
   • 1989, Gilbert Sorrentino, Misterioso; republished in Pack of Lies, Dalkey Archive Press, 1997, →ISBN, page 349:

     "George Brent has got one hell of a schlong on him," Tabitha ventures.
     "And how!" Lucy agrees enthusiastically. "I'd haul his ashes for him any time."

   • 2002, Stephen J. Cannell, The Viking Funeral, St. Martin's Press, →ISBN, page 157:

     Just do me a favor: if you decide to haul her ashes, don't tell Victory. He's got a crush on her, and so far she won't give him any play.

   • 2004, Iceberg Slim, Mama Black Widow, Holloway House Publishing, →ISBN, page 293:

     I still get beautiful ladies to haul my ashes when my old balls get heavy.

• (to move away): haul ass, skedaddle; see also Thesaurus:rush
• (to have sexual intercourse): discuss Uganda, have sex, Netflix and chill, show someone one's etchings; see also Thesaurus:copulate