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“Oh?” she said. “So you have decided to revise my guest list for me? You have the nerve, the – the –” I saw she needed helping out. “Audacity,” I said, throwing her the line. “The audacity to dictate to me who I shall have in my house.” It should have been “whom”, but I let it go. “You have the –” “Crust.” “– the immortal rind,” she amended, and I had to admit it was stronger, “to tell me whom” – she got it right that time – “I may entertain at Brinkley Court and who” – wrong again – “I may not.”
The stories did not seem to me to touch life. They were plainly intended to have a bracing moral effect, and perhaps had this result for the people at whom they were aimed.
“A very hearty pip-pip to you, old ancestor,” I said, well pleased, for she is a woman with whom it is always a privilege to chew the fat. “And a rousing toodle-oo to you, you young blot on the landscape,” she replied cordially.
(relative)Used to refer to a previously mentioned person or people.
That is the woman whom I spoke to earlier. (defining)
Mr Smith, whom we all know well, will be giving the speech. (non-defining)
He's a person with whom I work. (defining)
We have ten employees, half of whom are carpenters. (non-defining)
1935, George Goodchild, chapter 1, in Death on the Centre Court:
“Anthea hasn't a notion in her head but to vamp a lot of silly mugwumps. She's set her heart on that tennis bloke[…]whom the papers are making such a fuss about.”
The eminent brain specialist to whom she alluded was a man I would not have cared to lunch with myself, our relations having been on the stiff side since the night at Lady Wickham's place in Hertfordshire when, acting on the advice of my hostess's daughter Roberta, I had punctured his hot-water bottle with a darning needle in the small hours of the morning. Quite unintentional, of course.
1979 December 29, Tia Cross, “Lesbian Family Album”, in Gay Community News, volume 7, number 23, page 14:
A woman shooting pool whom you know has red hair even though the photograph is black and white.
(fused relative,archaic outside set patterns) The person(s) whom; whomever.
To whom it may concern, all business of John Smith Ltd. has now been transferred to Floggitt & Runne.
(informal, especially non-US)Also used with names of collective nouns that are groups of people, especially singularly-named musical groups or sports teams.
Whom was Lemmy bassist for? Motörhead!
Usage notes
Who is a subjectpronoun. Whom is an object pronoun. To determine whether a particular sentence uses a subject or an object pronoun, rephrase it to use he/she/they or him/her/them instead of who, whom; if you use he, she or they, then you use the subject pronoun who; if you use him, her or them, then you use the object pronoun. The same rule applies to whoever/whosoever/whoso and whomever/whomsoever/whomso. In the case of who(m)(so)ever, which usually plays a role in two phrases at once, it is the role in the internal ("downstairs") clause that determines the case. For example, Sell the sofa towhoeveroffers the most money for it uses whoever because it is the subject of the verb offers; the fact that it is also the object of to is irrelevant.
Who can also be used as an object pronoun, especially in informal writing and speech (hence one hears not only whom are you waiting for? but also who are you waiting for?), and whom may be seen as (overly) formal; in some dialects and contexts, it is hardly used, even in the most formal settings. As an exception to this, fronted prepositional phrases almost always use whom, e.g. one usually says with whom did you go?, not *with who did you go?. However, dialects in which whom is rarely used usually avoid fronting prepositional phrases in the first place (for example, using who did you go with?).
The use of who as an object pronoun is proscribed by many authorities, but is frequent nonetheless. It is usually felt to be much more acceptable than the converse hypercorrection in which whom is misused in place of who, as in *the savage whom spoke to me.
Instead of what or which, particularly in music and sports journalism, although a solecism in conventional or traditional grammar, who and whom are also used with names of collective nouns that define or describe groups of people, for instance singularly-named musical groups or sports clubs, in addition to teams with plural names of anthromorphic non-human beings or inanimate entities.
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